Six MORE Ways to Not Be Hated by an INTJ

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16 thoughts on “Six MORE Ways to Not Be Hated by an INTJ

  1. I’ve also found that INTJs sometimes confuse 3 with 1. No matter how logical, no one is free from assumptions, and different ways of communication cause those two to be… tricky.

    6 is well-said, except “lesser beings” hits one of my hot-buttons. The question is, tongue in cheek, or not?

    1. Tongue in cheek?
      I would venture to say both yes and no.

      1. That isn’t an answer. Either it is tongue and cheek, or it is what the author means masquerading as tongue and cheek, or it is a simple statement of perceived “fact.” Or, I suppose, it could be there to illicit a reaction, but even then, the question of underlying belief remains.

        1. OH MY GOSH YOU GUYS. YES, IT WAS TONGUE-IN-CHEEK. I even added a disclaimer at the beginning of this post saying so. Chill.

  2. I totally relate to #3. Finding out something is wrong way down the road is the worst.

    Also, this inspires me to write a follow-up post:

    How to not be hated by an ISFJ:

    Eh, you really don’t have anything to worry about.

    Thirdly, to what degree do you actually *expect* this from people? I read this list as relatively tounge-in-cheek, but the list-of-demands, people should be like me quality also rubs me the wrong way. Which partly has to do with the part of me that says “people should be like me, instead” so, yeah.

    1. Oh my gosh, YES, this was mostly tongue-in-cheek. I don’t expect everyone in the world to behave this way. It’s more of a “haha, if only, right?” inside-joke kid of thing. It’s nothing for anyone to take personally.

      1. Well, you can’t control other people’s reactions any more than we can yours.

      2. These are continual frustrations. Especially #1.

        I walk into a discussion with a list of obvious ‘givens’ meaning to bring up an extrapolated concept. Instead, I end up spending the entire length of the conversation just bringing people up to the starting point. Once there, I realize that if it took them this long to accept the obvious, there’s no purpose in trying to take it further. I end the topic, feeling bitter for lack of someone to really talk to.

        I don’t think it’s an in-joke at all. Saying it’s an in-joke is the real in-joke. :)

        Being outwardly contentious with others only wastes more time. Even though the river is taking us miles in the wrong direction, it’s still easier to stay in the boat than get out and hike.

  3. God bless you, Em!

  4. Your number 2 is in my top 3. Next to persons blinded by prejudice, I cant stand those who, as you put it, project a “falsely knowledgeable front”.

  5. I can really relate to this, especially 1 and 2. Put them together in a constant talker and you drive this INTJ up the walls! Number 6 also had me smiling

  6. Number five especially; I can’t stand it when my boyfriend gets upset because I didn’t “react” (leap for joy and cry happily) like he thought I would.

  7. #6 #6 #6 All the Way!!!

    This is the biggest obstacle to me at work with the two supervisors I have had who have thought it was acceptable to either harass me or “school” me inappropriately. They disliked me pointing out flaws in an attempt to solve or mitigate a problem and they were so dysfunctional they in turn used it against me as a performance issue for being too “negative.”

  8. I adore this. Thank you. I’ve learned that emotional people who ask for advice like to be told a praise of something they’re good at but then discuss the problem they’re having and offer a solution. But if you know they’re emotional, it’s really just a waste of breath. No one will take my advice unless I know they’re as analytical as me. Most are not.

    People call me heartless. I’m logical. Not heartless. Like females are supposed to be all fluff which is revolting thinking about it. I joined a running club cuz it gets my son to be more social. He’s 4 and an extrovert. Loves people. So I do what makes him happy. I joined a club but I run alone. I listen to convos in these female groups and can’t stand shallowspeak (my word for small talk). I want meaning. I find meaning in my run and beating my PR. I also write I create worlds and control the characters and environments. I expect them to rebel in accordance with their motivations and respond accordingly. Love being an INTJ writer. Love being a female INTJ writer. Hate when people call me heartless. Far from it. Far. From. It.

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